How Do We Handle Flexible Working Requests Without Damaging Trust?
By Laricelle Fouchee, Fouchee Mediation
“How do we respond fairly when an employee asks for flexible working, but we’re concerned about the impact on the team?” Start by understanding what they need, explain the operational concerns clearly, and explore possible arrangements before reaching a decision. You may not agree on the outcome, but a thoughtful conversation can help preserve trust.
For HR professionals and leaders, this is rarely just a question about hours or location. It can involve caring responsibilities, health, commuting costs and the practical demands of keeping a service running. When these pressures meet, people can quickly feel that their concerns are being dismissed.
Why this conversation matters now
Acas opened a consultation on its revised flexible working Code in October 2026. The proposals place emphasis on consultation, evidence and explaining decisions. These changes are expected in autumn 2027; employers should continue following the current Code until the changes take effect.
That discussion raises an immediate management question: how well do we explore requests before deciding whether they can work?
Understand the need behind the flexible working request
Imagine an employee asking to finish earlier twice a week. Their manager immediately thinks about afternoon cover. The employee, who has struggled to arrange childcare, hears hesitation as a lack of support.
Both have understandable concerns, but neither yet understands the other’s position.
A useful opening is: “Can you talk me through what you need this arrangement to achieve, and where you have flexibility?”
Give the employee space to explain without pressing for unnecessary personal information. Check your understanding before moving into operational objections. Listening does not commit you to approving the request; it gives you a better basis for considering it.
Make the operational concern specific
“We need everyone here” leaves little room for discussion. “We need two people available until 5pm because that is when customer enquiries peak” identifies a problem you can examine together.
Consider what the concern actually involves: customer demand, workload, supervision, handovers or access to particular skills. Distinguish evidence from assumptions about commitment or productivity.
Explain the pressure without suggesting that the employee is unreasonable for asking. Equally, give them an opportunity to suggest how their proposed arrangement could address it.
Explore options before positions harden
A conversation can become stuck when approval and refusal appear to be the only possibilities.
Could different start times help? Would an alternative day work? Could responsibilities be organised differently? Where appropriate, might a trial arrangement provide useful evidence?
For any trial, agree what success would look like, how the impact will be assessed and when you will review it. Avoid vague arrangements that leave one person expecting permanence while another sees a temporary concession.
Explain the decision and keep listening
A decision should connect clearly to the request and the evidence considered. Follow the applicable procedure, communicate the reasons and explain any available next steps.
If the answer is disappointing, allow the employee to respond. They may need clarification, or they may identify something that has been misunderstood.
Think about communication with the wider team too. You can explain working arrangements and responsibilities without disclosing someone’s private circumstances. Fairness does not always mean identical arrangements.
When the disagreement becomes personal
Sometimes the request exposes an existing relationship difficulty. An employee feels repeatedly overlooked; a manager feels their concerns are never accepted. Future conversations then become harder.
Where appropriate, voluntary workplace mediation can help people discuss those concerns and agree how to work together. It should not be used to bypass the flexible working procedure or pressure someone to withdraw a request.
The aim is to reach a considered decision while keeping communication open. Even where agreement is difficult, people should understand that their request received proper attention.
If a flexible working disagreement has affected relationships in your organisation, I offer workplace mediation and conflict coaching in Durham and surrounding areas.
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